Figuring out Happy

Fun. It’s what I rediscovered about myself after I became a single mom. I’m still fun! Weird, but let me explain. I felt bogged down, anxious, like there was something wrong but I couldn’t put my finger on it. So I chalked it up to parenting. (Kids can truly suck the life out of us, right?!) .

But why? I honestly had no clue why I just couldn’t relax. I guess it’s intuition that tells us when something is wrong, but we are mostly just trying to get through the day without accidents or meltdowns, so we don’t have the sense to stop and we can’t put our finger on what it is. Or maybe our heart doesn’t want to acknowledge when the brain is telling us something is askew. And that’s how I’d been living for a while without even realizing it. It’s confusing how relationships change, how marriages change, and how people change. We think we know the outcome, that it’s clear and simple, like 2+2. I thought I got married, had kids, and then was cruising through life, just a bit stressed out. Really, I was cruising for a bruising…I just didn’t see it coming! .

Regardless, I felt like the fun part of me had disappeared. I felt stressed and unhappy. So ironically, now that I’m on my own with the kids, single mom life, I enjoy my time more and I’m having fun! Yes, it’s incredibly hard and exhausting, it’s 24/7 (don’t let the glimpses of sunsets and bike rides fool you 🤪) but my life feels lighter, more free, and happy. I’ve figured out what makes ME happy! I’d lost a simple part of who I was, but an important part nonetheless. It’s the little things that I love to do by myself, like ride my bike, watch the sunset, or blast the car radio with the windows down! So ask yourself, what are the small things that make you happy? And if you are going through divorce, sit down and think about this. Because you ARE in control of yourself, even if you aren’t in control of life. Remember what makes YOU feel happy and free, and do it! .