Dating is so Fun!…(Until it’s not)

Am I right? I know everyone has had this experience. Everything is great, just sunshine and rainbows. Then suddenly you screech to a halt and go “Wait. What??”

Ironically, I thought I knew and understood men. You know, because I was married to one. When I was married, I doled out dating advice like candy to all my single friends….And then lo and behold, I was single again. And suddenly it was new territory, given the last time I dated I was 25 and the year was 2010.

Well, now I can eat humble pie (or crow pie?). Not sure about that saying. But the moral of my story is, it’s easy to dish out advice when the situation doesn’t involve our own hearts. When we think we know, we are just oh so full of wisdom!

Dating is fun…until it isn’t. Until you feel the sting of rejection, or you realize that person just isn’t who you thought they were.

Now, yes, of course I realize it’s much better to find this out sooner rather than later. Logically, it will hurt less, a slight sting instead of a sobfest. And logically, that person just isn’t the right one. And yes, there is a better plan, and a better guy at some point. That’s just dating. We have to kiss a few frogs (or bottom feeders) as we swim our way through the murky sea of dating. We all know that.

But we are only human, and we all have hearts.

(Hmm, debatable?)

Today, I reminded myself that my heart was shattered only a year ago. The pain of betrayal is unreal and I’m glad to be where I am now. I did the work, dealt with the pain, and pieced those shattered pieces of my heart back together. I came out stronger, more assertive, more sure of my values and morals. I’d even call myself a badass; I’m tough, fun, can weather the worst of life’s storms and still look for humor in the situation. (You probably can too, so remind yourself of this! Not only are you a mom, you’re a badass mom. It has a nice ring to it, right?! And yesterday WAS International Womens Day….)

(As I am typing this, the song I Lived, by One Republic just came on. I’ll take that as sign. Go look it up if you haven’t heard it, it’s empowering!)

So as 2019 came to an end, I even found myself on the back of a musician’s Harley Davidson, and thought “Life sure is crazy!!” But crazy good. Life is crazy and good and full of all kinds of surprises. Including hurt. This is just life. For all of us.

But getting back to dating….

A healed heart is sensitive. It needs time.

So sayonara to you, dating world, it’s been real. It’s been fun. But for now, I’m dating myself. Because my sweet little heart just wants to avoid more boo-boo’s, in my kids sweet words.

And I like to listen to to my heart, because it seems to know what I need.

And since I like to count my blessings at times like these – not to diminish my feelings – but to remind myself of what I DO have, here we go:

Awesome kids

Amazing friends

Family

Health

Home

Food

Cute clothes (I mean, come on, that’s a blessing, right?!)

Comfy shoes (yup)

Talenti Gelato (Ending this post now, I need to go look into a partnership with them….)

Until next time, friends! But for now, I’ll take some age old advice:

Stay true to yourself and listen to your heart.

Truer words were never spoken.