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I wasn’t made for this- I was made BY this.
What if I told you that yesterday was a good day, a great day? That as the sun cast a warm glow over the evening sky, and my kids raced each other up and down the block on their scooters, I was grateful? That in that moment, I was filled with joy. Would you believe me? A year ago, I would have struggled to believe that myself. But it’s true. And it’s truly a miracle. I may not be a wife, I may have become a #singlemom & #divorcee before my kids have even entered Kindergarten, but that’s okay. I know I’m so much more. I have SO much to…
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Getting Along With Your Ex & Why It Actually IS Important
Last year I read all these books that said fighting with your ex causes extreme emotional damage to children. It annoyed me, to say the least! While I definitely didn’t want to hurt my kids, the thought of dealing with my ex-husband on a weekly basis, did not put a smile on my face. It made me recoil in anger and disgust. Yet here I am, smiling at him, saying hi, and occasionally making small talk during pickups and drop offs. Why do I do this? Because of my kids. They didn’t ask for this, and it’s not their fault. Their life has been disrupted enough, and they don’t need…
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Happy Valentines To You, Single Mama
It’s Valentine’s Day! The day of cupid, love, and lots of pink & red. Also, a day that reminds you of your divorced or newly single status… (As if you need another reminder, right??) For me last year, the holiday loomed up in front of me like a red flag (or open heart surgery). I was one month into my new, grief filled life: ringless, husbandless, and a newly single mom. I was devastated, angry, and still in shock over what my then husband had done to me and to our family. But that morning, on February 14th, the dreaded day of love arrived even when I wished it wouldn’t.…
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8 Lessons I’ve Learned as a Single Mom
Well, it’s the last day of 2019, and yes, that’s me on a motorcycle. A Harley Davidson to be specific! There’s a first time for everything, friends! One year ago I was sobbing my eyes out, mourning the loss of my marriage, of my future dreams, and of a life that I felt had been unfairly snatched away from me. So as I look back on the changes that occurred this year, I thought it wise to share what I’ve learned. Don’t sweat the small stuff. I used to worry about things that were honestly, not a huge deal. Worrying over things that didn’t ever come to fruition was a…
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An unfortunate reality
“Infidelity threatens our sense of self…A violation of trust.” ~Esther Perel, Rethinking Infidelity, Ted Talk If you have ever watched Esther Perel’s Ted Talk, you may remember this quote. She tells us that affairs in the past were discovered by “a receipt in the pants pocket, or lipstick on the collar”. Yet now, the discovery of an affair is usually through technology. And what ensues is a digital trail of emails, text messages, and pictures, that span the length of the affair and reveal the intimate thoughts of both people involved. It is truly what she calls “death by a thousand cuts”. Almost a year ago, I discovered my husband’s…
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A Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing
Is honesty important to you? It is to me. So sometimes I scratch my head and wonder how I didn’t see the web of lies that complicated my marriage for years. In hindsight, I see so much more. But when you are standing in the middle of something, your view is skewed, and it’s almost impossible to see the truth for what it is. False information. Made up stories. Excuses. It’s hard to fit the puzzle pieces together because they don’t fit. Lies built up on more lies. You know the saying, a wolf in sheep’s clothing? It’s pretty accurate….Yes, liars can portray themselves as the most honest, charming, stand…
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The bomb that dropped on my white picket fence…
Well it took a crazy upset to shake things up and push me in a new direction. What was that upset, you ask? Divorce. Well, infidelity…and then divorce. The infidelity was like a bomb landing on my life back on December 23rd. Divorce was the path I chose, and I chose it to walk away from the all consuming mushroom of smoke and debris that had become my life. Walking away, and choosing a new path turned me in the right direction when I was so disoriented, I didn’t know up from down. It allowed me to breath, to focus on moving forward, and moving away from something so broken…
